? Laugh more (I laugh as if my life depends upon it bc it does!)
? Drink less (alcohol lost its appeal)
? Swear more ???? (common among victims of Covid loved ones lost to hospital protocol$)
?I don’t save many broken things for Todd to fix later, he could fix just about anything and saved us so much $$$
? Socialize less (less free time doing both roles)
? I eat cereal and sandwiches because it’s quick and my son likes boring foods
? I listen to music a lot, I used to prefer silence
? I don’t watch movies or TV shows much
? I have an amazing mink Lola blanket I snuggle with and sleep on top of my comforter, not under the sheets naked
? Worry, stress and fear do not have as much hold on me since facing my greatest fear and surviving
? No one can threaten me with death
? My evenings are filled with loneliness followed by nights of insomnia, I often remind myself of Jeremiah 29:11 and I choose to believe my life isn’t over and by some miracle the best is yet to be
? I knew how to be scrappy and resourceful, but am even more now
? I rarely go to restaurants because I don’t want to sit alone
? I am in total awe of the the masculine and how much it balances the feminine
? I am very guarded about keeping my son and I safe, I installed a security system and keep guns close by
? I actually notice when I’m in the presence of a good looking man and wonder if he’s available (I had blinders on my entire Married life)
? I find myself wondering if Home Depot or Heb grocery store might be a good place to find a hard-working God-fearing widower since I don’t frequent bars and I don’t want to do online dating apps.
? When I’m required to do a task he used to do, it takes me a long time to think it through and figure out how I’m gonna do what he did…a long time
? The tenderness and affection I feel for my son and he for me is like 100 times greater; he enjoys spending time with me now (Todd was his best friend and Andrew had unforgiveness toward me since becoming a teen) I am much much easier on him. This was my #1 concern after Todd passed, how am I gonna do what he did for Andrew? God turned it into my #1 praise and blessing
? I started packing a lunch for my son each day and I had no idea How loved a PB & J sandwich would make him feel ??
? I am constantly playing detective trying to follow the clues Todd left me and wondering what was in his brain esp RE building and tools and projects that fell into my lap
?I am very hug deprived
?I am so much more tender, compassionate and grateful
?Extreme exhaustion and lack of deep breathing
?Materialism doesn’t draw me in and chasing after money doesn’t appeal to me
? Eternity is so real and all that matters
? I am more Self aware and True to my feelings
? I have less excuses because there’s No one else to blame
“Not gonna lie, Grieving is the most exhausting work I’ve ever done!”